These thoughts come to me the day after Christmas (2022) on hand of a card our grandson, Finn (now 15), made for his grandparents—me (Nonna) and my husband (Juju). This is the very kind of treasure of which I speak. His card may be kept for a generation or two after I have “shuffled off this mortal coil,” but with no one to truly know or remember what it has meant to me. Its memory and meaning will be lost.
But what it represents will never fade away?
Dear Nonna and Juju,
I love you so extremely much. I am so grateful
or all the Christmases we have had together
and will have the rest to come. Merry Christmas
from your #1 grandson Finn.
I will treasure this thing of beauty for Finn’s creativity, the effort put into it, its message, but, most of all, for the shared love it represents. While the card itself may be lost or forgotten, the love it represents will remain beyond this earthly plane. I believe that.
“Love that’s love not fade away” is a line from a song “Not Fade Away,” made famous in the 1957 by Buddy Holly, and again by the Rolling Stones in1964.
“Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks/But bears it out even to the edge of doom” are lines from my favorite Shakespeare sonnet, #116, which also expresses in a more formal way that love is everlasting and will never fade away. There must be infinite examples throughout time of this same insight—in literature, poetry, song, philosophy, and in sacred texts.
“In every religion there is love, yet love has no religion.” (Rumi)
Any distortions of love, or inability to express it dissolves in the perpetual light of love that is always with us, shining upon us beyond space and time.
When my sister and I were clearing our parents’ house after they had passed away, we found a notebook my mother kept toward the end of her life, containing her familiar sense of humor, as well as sentiments she never would have expressed out loud. There were words, oddly enough, from a song called “That’s All She Wrote”: It’s a shame that the laughter didn’t outweigh all the tears.
There was a note she kept from our brother who had left it on the keyboard he played saying that he would never play music again. It must have been his realization that a once-enjoyable talent, ambition and interest were now eclipsed by his addiction to drugs and alcohol. He died from an overdose.
We gathered the journal, note, and other papers that, while maybe not precious treasures per se, were undoubtedly expressions in one way or another, of an underlying love that wanted to express itself in untenable situations--meaningful, painful expressions with associations my sister and I could never have fully understood.
One cold winter night we burned them in the fireplace, with a wish that all the sadness in the house, harsh things said and left unsaid would dissipate in the rising smoke to be received where only love remains.
Is there proof that love is eternal, connects us beyond this earthy plane? Do we just want to believe that it is? These are questions we may ask, doubts we may have. I believe, while the precious things we hold dear in life are, after all, just things, the love they represent is what is precious, lasting and does not fade away. Whenever there has been true love, a soul connection, it is never extinguished, but eternal.
When our loved ones depart, precious mementos are symbols of the love they have taken with them and their love they have left behind with us.
Remembering them is connection.
I know intuitively that this is so and is affirmed as the “concept” of eternal love is affirmed by my experience of love over a lifetime. While I remain on this earthly plane, I will cherish Finn’s card, a reminder that our shared love is forever—simply, but aptly, reflected in the lines of a song:
“Love that’s love not fade away”
and a sonnet:
“Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
No comments:
Post a Comment