I write about betrayal. What of it? What is it? How do we live with it?
In Dante's "Inferno," betrayal is the greatest sin, punished in the lowest circle of Hell. Lucifer, the rebellious angel, is trapped there in ice for all eternity. He flaps his wings to free himself, which only traps him more firmly. In his mouth he gnaws on Judas Iscariot, Brutus and Cassius--historical betrayers.
Betrayal may be seen as one of the worst transgressions as it crosses what is thought of as an inviolable boundary. For the betrayed, it can cause the greatest degree of depair. No mater how justified it is to the betrayer, it may reverberate for the betrayed—sometimes for a lifetime. In some cases, there is collateral damage to others in the circle of the betrayed and the betrayer, such as to children when a marriage ends.
Loving is vulnerability and never a guaranatee, yet we love and trust. One feels betrayal when there was love and trust, and a stated or perceived commitment involved. Betrayal breaks that trust and nullifies the commitment, thus is a kind death, perhaps to both the betrayer and the betrayed. It has been said that the only thing a betrayer ultimately betrays is his conscience (Joseph Conrad). That is assuming the betrayer has a conscience—sometimes yes, sometimes not.
The betrayer may feel circumstances may have changed such that a commitment or vow must be cast aside along with the person who has loved and trusted them. Author Barbara Kingsolver notes that "Every betrayal contains... a coin stamped heads or tails with salvation on the other side"--a paradox: salvation for the betrayer and maybe eventually for the betrayed, who comes to see what the reality had been all along, or what part he may have played in the inevitable by enabling or giving power to a person ultimately incapable of commitment, loyalty or sacrifice? And who of us can say for sure that, under certain circumstances, we might also find ourselves incapable?
One of most well known betrayers, as noted in Dante's Divine Comedy, is Judas Iscariot. Here the paradox of betrayal is clear: a "predestined" fate for Judas Iscariot to betray his friend and teacher for a few pieces of silver, which set into motion Christ's reason for coming to earth to "die for our sins," as the story goes.
Perhaps most betrayals in our own mortal stories are also paradoxes, neither betrayer nor betrayed fully understanding the reasons for, or the consequences of it, which may, in the end, be "for the best."
Nevertheless, the betrayed must endure the pain and suffering, and may not be able to say, as Christ did: “Forgive them, for they know not what they do."
